I’m sorry I’m not the girl you desire anymore. Im sorry I can’t make you happy anymore. Call me a fool, which I am, but I am so in love with you. I memorized your eyes and the way our skin felt when we touched. I remember the way you used to look at me with so much love in your eyes. You promised me forever but now I’m getting nothing. You tell me to leave you alone, my friends tell me to leave you alone, and I tell myself to leave you alone. But what do I do when my brain is telling me the right thing to do, and my heart is holding me back to keep trying to fight for you? Ill say it bluntly, I’m a little bitch right now. Lost and confused, drained and sad. I can do nothing more but sit and wait for you to realize how much you are fucking up. No girl will ever love you half as much as I do. Im obviously being pathetic and I hate myself for it because all it is doing is turning me into a joke. I’d do anything for you, anything to get you back. Yeah sure, this girl may be cooler than me, have more friends than me, be prettier than me, and may give you feelings right now. But in the end, I’m sure she would leave you high and dry the way you left me. You have been putting me through so much this past month, a normal human being would have walked away the day you did. But i’m still here, God knows why, still wanting your attention and affection. I always feel like giving up though, but something is holding me back. I miss your smile, your laugh, the way you snort your nose when you have boogies and I miss your touch. I miss the way we used to love each other and hold each others hands in the cold. I miss everything about you and how happy we both made each other. You ask me how can you miss me when I’m always there, but how can you not think of me when you are holding someone else while they lay their head on your chest? I have so much frustration inside of me. It hurts knowing you want to make another girl happy, and not make me happy. I feel like I am lacking so much right now, and that I am not good enough. Im opening up my heart to you right now, saying things I would never say to any other boy. And you laugh at me, and taking how strongly I feel for you as a joke. Every day is like a battle with myself because all I need right now is you to see how much I love you and see that this whole situation is wrong. How can i win the fight with a young boys temptation? we belong together. It was almost like fate how we met, because the way we met is like the way people meet in movies and live happily ever after. Please just give me another chance to show you that this is right. I want to go away with you, make you dinners, tuck you into bed with me at night, fall asleep in your arms again, and make love to each other.

But that will never happen, will it? Sometimes in life, love is just not enough. And it always rains the hardest on the people who give out their love.

Holy shit. I am going to die now. Goodbye

Marina And The Diamonds - Lies

You’re never gonna love me, so what’s the use? // What’s the point in playing a game you’re gonna lose? // What’s the point in saying you love me like a friend? / What’s the point in saying it’s never gonna end // You’re to proud to say that you’ve made a mistake // You’re a coward to the end // I don’t wanna admit, but we’re not gonna fit // No, I’m not the type that you like // Why don’t we just pretend? // Lies, don’t wanna know// I can’t let you go // I just want it to be perfect to believe it’s all been worth the fight // You only ever touch me in the dark // Only if we’re drinking can you see my spark // And only in the evening that you give yourself to me // Cause the night is your woman, and she’ll set you free